Validation.

Today's post was inspired by a fellow English teacher, Twitter user, friend -- Cheryl Mizerny @CherylTeaches.  While we've never met in person, we met through sharing ideas, thoughts, and words through the Internet.  She probably knows my educational approach as well as people who I walk down the hallway daily with.

Because words are important.

Conversations are important.

Relationships are important.

(Shout out to Cheryl! You rock!)

So I was reading her blog.  I see part of participating in the #10SummerBlogs challenge as reading other blogs.  Every time I interact with another's thoughts, it gives me a slightly bigger perspective.

This paragraph stuck out:

"My sister’s best friend, a teacher, was featured on Oprah Winfrey’s show finale so I watched when I normally did not. I’m glad I did. Oprah said something that has stayed with me ever since: 'I’ve talked to nearly 30,000 people on this show, and all 30,000 had one thing in common: They all wanted validation. If I could reach through this television and sit on your sofa or sit on a stool in your kitchen right now, I would tell you that every single person you will ever meet shares that common desire. They want to know: "Do you see me? Do you hear me? Does what I say mean anything to you?"' She put into words what I wanted a child and what I want for my students. This is my idea of the perfect classroom—a place where every student feels acknowledged, validated, and cherished."

They all wanted validation.

They all wanted to know they matter. They have something to say. They make an impact on the world.

This is an important perspective as an educator, a parent, an adult, a human being.  What can we do to extend the knowledge that "you matter" to everyone?

What would the world look like if we did?

Sometimes noticing the "small" things really makes a difference.

When I walk down the halls, I greet my students (when possible) by name, smile, make eye contact and let them know I'm glad they're there. (I've even this through song . . . but that's another post.)  I can still see the face of a young lady who was telling me about a book she was reading.  I told her, "and that is precisely one of the things I love about you."  Her face was shocked. 

It shouldn't have been.  She is an amazing young lady. She's smart, creative, fun.

Later her mom wrote me and told me how much that meant to her daughter.  She'd had a rough year with family changes. It was a new school.  Saying those words meant so much to her.  It meant so much that she went home and talked about it with her mom.

I'd meet another student with, "Now go set the world on fire."  Of course we had the usual literal jokes that arose from that statement.  What he needed to hear was that someone believed in him.  I do.  I know he will impact the world.

Last week he told me thank you.

He took time out of his summer to say thank you.

I have parents telling me all the time that their child talks about me and my class at home.  They tell me how much it means to them. What does this boil down to?  Real relationships.

My challenge is to always SEE my students -- balance what they need with what I need and make the best choices I can. 

Do I fail?  Yes.

Do I apologize when I do? Yes.

Does that often open the door for another chance?  Yes.

Validation.  It's important.